Walking it out.

Limitations, imperfections, fatigued, oh my!  I felt as though Sarah Mae was sitting with me this whole week and writing specifically to me.
I hit bed on last Friday evening and was very sick.  I did not emerge from that bed until Wednesday of this week. I am still recovering and not completely 100%.  With a full calendar, I truly felt my limitations. Letting go and letting His grace cover over all that I could not change or do, was necessary and welcomed.


While sitting on the floor, crying, I came to understand what it truly meant to have a sound mind, a spirit that wanted to go, but a human body that was incapable of doing what I wanted it to do. I was made fully aware of how this body of mine will wear out.  Needless to say, I was frustrated and oh so fatigued. Since my fatigue was brought on by illness and then the stress of that illness, the only thing I could do was to get back into bed and remind myself again, to cling to His grace. It is sufficient.


Perfection? Me? I had signed up to make chocolate covered strawberries for my daughters 8th grade graduation. Before I was sick. :) The picture in my head went something like this: Beautiful, put together momma makes said strawberries, while laughing with my children, cleaning as I go, looking hot to my my husband the whole time I'm doing it, and finishing with plenty of time to spare. Ending up with beautiful strawberries, clean kitchen, and great memories for family.  
This is really how it went: Feeling so behind and stressed because of being sick, I turned into momma grinch.  I burnt the chocolate (twice), had to send hubby to get more, yelled at my kids (more then once), had to apologize multiple times to all involved, and needless to say was finishing up making them 15 min. before the ceremony.  My kitchen was a mess and I was not a pleasant momma or wife.  I had blown it. I literally told him that by golly my license plate said super mom and I was going to be super mom :).  He did quickly inform me that he could easily rip that off of my car. 

Today, I am leaving on a camping trip.  One that I was not completely ready for, I lacked the energy to get ready.  My plan was to do a little every day through out the week.  I have had to cram so much into the last two days, my mind won't turn off at night, so I am not sleeping well. At this point in time what is motivating me is spending time with friends. I am looking forward to getting away.  


I am struggling with figuring out my "jazzy" and writing a lesson plan.  I am praying over these two items and when I know I will share. :)


For the second week in a row, the Mary challenges took center stage.  I am comforted by the fact that I had spring cleaned 3 weeks ago.  So everything on my living room list had been done.  So I didn't beat up on myself.  Again, His grace is sufficient.  Seems to be my mantra :)